“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid.”
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation , by prayer and petition with thanksgiving
present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds
In Christ Jesus.
Thank you for the blessings of the day.
Please be with Jim and me as we walk our journey with you.
Surround us with your Holy Spirit as individuals and as a couple.
Place your Holy Spirit around our home and in our home so that those who
encounter us or pass our home will experience a peace that passes ALL understanding.
I share this portion of a prayer that I pray each night before going to bed. For me, there is no going to sleep or peaceful night’s sleep until I have said my prayers to God and place the night and the day ahead into his hands. Last night was no different with the exception that I was to the point of exhaustion that I literally just collapsed into my Father’s arms as I prayed.
In this process of prayer time and writing, I am awaiting tests results. Life is happening with its twists and turns. I haven’t felt well for most of the summer. Thus, prompting a visit to my doctor. Over the years we have known that I was border line lupus. Jim and I knew that there was a possibility that one day that those lab numbers could/would cross the line and a new and not wanted diagnoses would occur. It is something that I am still trying to understand and get my head around.
On top of me not feeling well, we have found out that Jim’s father’s cancer has begun to be active again. Thus, Jim is taking more time off from work to go to take care of his Mom and Dad and to be with them at doctor’s visits. Neither Jim nor me begrudge Jim having to make these trips. It is just what you do for the people who brought you into this world and who have loved, nurtured and stood by your side in growing up and in watching you raise a family.
With both of these scenarios taking place simultaneously and trying to keep up with the activities we participate in with our church, small groups, work and community, it has become overwhelming at times. Jim and I both have had to say no to some activities and put some things on hold until we can get a handle on all that is happening in our lives right now. Yet, we have and will keep the faith and look up. There are days that our strength is nothing but the Lord’s doing and working in our lives.
As I said earlier I collapsed into my Father’s arms with exhaustion. I poured out my heart to him and in doing so I was reminded of the two scriptures from John 14:27 and Philippians 4:6-7. Despite all that is going on in the Hawkins home and the possibilities of what may come I know there is no need to be anxious because I have a loving Father walking by my side. This same Father is walking beside Jim as well and us as a couple. Last night, I closed by asking the Father to allow me to fall asleep in his arms, and to feel that peace that he promises us in John.
Then the indescribable happened. laying on my side asleep facing Jim, I felt these arms wrap around all around me. As these arms wrapped around me, I felt this indescribable warmth. The arms that came around me and hugged me tight. This was a hug I have ever experienced on this earth. I wish I could describe the way the arms felt and the warmth felt. Yet, it is all beyond any words I can say or write. It is beyond comprehension. Though this hug is indescribable and beyond comprehension, I can say that there was that peace that passes all understanding promised from our Father that wrapped around me as I felt this hug.
This morning I tried to tell Jim of this experience. There was a struggle for words to describe what I had felt in the night. As I struggled to describe the indescribable, I simply looked at Jim and said; “Jesus came last night. He hugged me. I felt His peace.” This morning I didn’t wake up healed or feeling different physically but I woke up with a new joy in my life despite all that is happening right now. I don’t know what is in store for me or any of my family members in the days ahead. However, I have been affirmed that Jim nor I are walking the journey alone. My Father who hugged me in the night is right there placing peace in ALL situations. And, it is a peace that passes ALL understanding and comprehension.
“His eye is on the sparrow and I KNOW He watches me.”
If that one moment of peace and hug last night was indescribable, I can only imagine what it’s going to feel like when I meet my Father face to face. Holy Goose Bumps!