“This Is Only A Test”

“Faith is to believe what we do not see, and the reward of this faith is to see what we believe.” St. Augustine



 God: This is only a test.

April:   God, what do you mean another test? Over the last four years, I have almost lost a husband, a mother in law, had to quit a job due to health issues, my son moves to Chicago and now my father in law is diagnosed with mesothelioma  a rare and rapid cancer! You say that you will only give as much as I can handle but I think I have handled enough! Don’t you remember the other day where I yelled at you because I was mad!  Of course, there have been a few other tests you have recently put me through that we won’t even discuss now. What is it with all these tests?!

God: April, you are my precious child. Yes, I would not give you anymore than you can handle. Look at your list that you just shot at me. When your mother in law was in the hospital for so long, you and your family learned more about working as team to get things done.  Yes, you almost lost your precious Jim once but did you not learn to appreciate every day you have with him?  The health issues taught you more about empathy, encouragement, and how to praise Me in the storms of life.  As far as Drew moving to Chicago,  he was and is doing what I called him to do. Through this move, you have learned even more about flexibility and appreciating the times you do have together. 

My child, all of these tests plus others have prepared you for the test that was put before you with your father in law. You see, now you know more about praising Me in the storms, you know more about appreciating the days that I wake you up, how to cling to me, trust me and I do believe our relationship has deepened through all of these tests.  April, I have walked beside you and carried you every step of the way.   Through the test before you, you will learn more about  patience, unconditional love, and will forget self just a little more.  No matter what, I am with you every step of the way and all that is before you is all a part of my greater plan. Remember, I am your Creator and I love you so very much. Remember the words of David, ” Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.” (Psalm 139:23) April, I know your heart and all of your anxieties and it will be your faith in Me that you will not only pass this test but will be all the stronger in the end.

April: God, thanks for listening. Thank you for showing me all that you have taught me through all the tests I have already taken. I love you, too. Now, I have faith(pen) and prayer (paper) in hand ready to take this test. It will be through this test that I will learn to love more, trust you even more, appreciate each breath taken, praise you on the bad days  and to capture every moment given.  For, I know  you will be there to dry my earthly tears until the day that there will be no more tests or tears.  It is  through all the tests  you make all things new. (Revelation 21:1-8)  Let the test begin.  God, I am putting my hand in yours, I am ready to take the test. It is only a test!

God:  Now, you understand.